I just finished my first week back at school and my brain is poo. While I was on vacation I complained that I was so bored my brain was rotting off its stem, but now I have the opposite problem. As usual, my professors feel they have something to prove by starting off the semester gangbusters, and my two-credit journal commitment suddenly requires that I spend ten hours per day for the past three days editing student articles that, quite frankly, make very little sense to me. I seem to have forgotten anything related to the Thai language, and spent NINE HOURS this weekend re-learning how to draw complicated little symbols, of which it takes approximately twenty five to make a single word like “cat.” (And if you slip up and put one of the symbols in the wrong place, you’re actually saying “dirty rotten whore whose worthless existence nauseates me.”)
On top of that, my bar application is due soon and is completely f-ed up. Over the past month and a half I’ve called every state I ever held a driver’s license in (four), ordered transcripts from every college I ever attended (five), tried to track down addresses for every apartment I’ve lived in for the past ten years, including those in foreign countries (fifteen and counting), and begged six friends to fill out and notarize a complicated form saying I’ve never done drugs, never had dirty sex on the desk with my boss, and never stole large amounts of money from my grandma. (And reader, I can guarantee I haven’t done all three of those things. And if you understand that last statement, you understand me.)
What’s holding me up now is that they need detailed information about every single job I’ve held in the past ten years, whether paid or unpaid. They want to know the name and address of the company I worked for, the name of my supervisor, the exact dates I was employed, the reason I left the job, and the precise name of my position. I’m thinking “Kandy Grrl”* is gonna look really weird on that form, and I’m beginning to wonder how people with interesting lives ever become eligible to practice law. Oh, right. Question asked and answered.
* Readers, I love you, I really do. When I get a comment on a post, it makes my day. But seriously, don’t irritate me with irritating comments or e-mails about Kandy Grrl. Really, anything you can say has already been said.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
10 comments:
I am really disappointed Kandy Girl comments are off the table.
My head hurts just thinking about getting all that info together - maybe they would accept an interpretative dance featuring highlights of the last several years of your life?
I went through the same process - this is one of those times it really pays to be a 23 year old law student instead of a 28 year old one. I, too, have moved around a ton - I had 17 addresses for the last 10 years, and I think my jobs numbered into the 20's.
I had such a hard time even remembering which jobs I had that far back, let alone title, supervisor, and dates. In 1997, I worked for the university where I went to undergrad. When I called them to find out the exact dates of my employment, they that said my records were on microfilm (am I that old?!?!) and that it would take weeks to find the information. The lady I spoke to said that no bar examiner had ever called them looking for verification for employment going that far back (and this is at a major university), so I would be safe estimating my dates of employment. This made me both happy (yay! I can make stuff up!) and furious (why must they torture me with such a task if they don't even care to verify???).
kandy grrl? do I even want to know haha
don mills diva! interpretive dance! hahahahahahahah!
newduck, you cracked me up with this post. and i looked at the thai test. umm. i'm drawing a blank. the characters are awfully pretty, though!
Welcome back. I was getting worried about you. I'm glad no one has asked me to resurrect my college Russian to edit papers. They would all be “dirty rotten whore whose worthless existence nauseates me.”
You've suddenly made the thought of doing my tax form today seem easy peazy, lemon squeezy. And thank you for the updated link - I get all squealy about comments, links and stuff.
Sorry, that anonymous was me - I wasn't paying attention with the sign-in thing.
Isn't "dirty rotten whore whose worthless existence nauseates me" much more entertaining than writing "cat" anyway?
My head hurt after reading all of what you have to do... wow.
And I am totally not even commenting on the Kandy Girl thing... since I totally do not even get it. And really it's okay. Since I didn't even comment about it :-)
Post a Comment